On Today’s Show

By: Dave Palmer

31/3/2021

CK Mornings

Kingston Police suspended yet another DIY licence plate that really didn’t pass the eye test. It was a hand made plate on a motorcycle that also had a spelling mistake.

The driver, who was charged by police, apparently didn’t do their research on Ontario plates, writing the slogan “Live Free Or Die…” on the plate.

That slogan actually appears on plates from New Hampshire, but it didn’t even say that — the aspiring artist drawing it missed an “e.” in free. 

It’s the second such licence plate found in Kingston in the past few weeks — the one was also hand-drawn, but at least there weren’t any spelling errors.

 

A couple in California recently got married on a dock at Lake Tahoe, and the groom dropped his bride’s ring in the water.  But they found a scuba diver on Facebook, and he went looking the next day. 

 

This probably isn’t what you dream about when you’re in the police academy.  A rookie cop in Michigan named Johnathan Garcia made his first arrest on Monday . . . after a guy was caught defecating in broad daylight in front of a church. 

 

Actor-comedian David Ury does very funny dramatic readings of TV theme songs.  Here he is reading the “Friends” theme as if he’s your buddy who’s disappointed with the direction your life is heading.  And yet, he’ll be there for you.

 

The province has decided to “provide more opportunities to enjoy Ontario parks” and is encouraging visits by offering free day-use entry Mondays to Thursdays May 1 to Sept. 2 this year “to help more people and families enjoy outdoor activities”.

(For those who have already purchased permits,  Ontario Parks is extending the expiry date of the 2021 Annual Daily Vehicle Permit for one year to Dec. 31, 2022 and providing 2021 Summer Daily Vehicle Permit holders an additional season to use their permit. The summer daily vehicle permit will now be valid April 1 to Nov 30, 2021 and April 1 to Nov 30, 2022. Refunds are also available.)

TODAY IS……………….

 

  • “Farm Workers Day”, encouraging us to thank agricultural laborers for their role in growing what we eat. 

 

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COUNTRY MUSIC NOTE

1977  Glen Campbell was at #1 “Southern Nights”. Written by Allen Toussaint it was the first single released from Campbell’s 1977 album, Southern Nights. The lyrics of “Southern Nights” were inspired by childhood memories Toussaint had of visiting relatives in the Louisiana backwoods which often entailed storytelling under star-filled nighttime skies.

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CICADAS LIVING UNDERGROUND FOR THE PAST 17 YEARS TO EMERGE

Cicadas are a part of summer many people might like to forget. But, scientists from several US universities say a brood of periodical cicadas is set to emerge from underground for the first time in 17 years.

 

It’s known as Brood X, or the “Big Brood,” and will likely first emerge across the Southern US at the beginning of spring, before surfacing in states along the East Coast. Americans can likely expect to see swarms across 15 states as the ground temperature warms. 

 

Dr. Michael Raupp says, “[…] They’re going to emerge in massive numbers. And, when I say massive, I mean massive. There are going to be as many as 1.5 million cicadas per acre. This is going to translate up and down the coast west of the Mississippi—people say billions. I tend to hyperbole, but I’m saying there are probably going to be trillions.” 

 

The black-bodied insects with bright red eyes last appeared en masse in 2004, and generally die after two-to-four weeks, following intercourse. Raupp recommended that people who might be afraid of cicadas try to learn as much about the harmless insects known for their loud mating calls as they can.

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FOUR RANDOM FACTS 

  1. BMW had to recall their GPS navigation system in Germany in the ’90s, because at the time German men refused to take directions from a female voice.

 

  1. Safeway grocery stores in the U.S. once had a mandatory policy that employees had to smile and make eye contact with customers . . . but they canceled it after too many male customers thought the female employees were hitting on them.

 

  1. Red Solo cups are a popular souvenir for European tourists to take home after they visit the U.S.

 

  1. There’s a town called Zilwaukee in Michigan.  The founders chose the name in 1848 to try to confuse people who were planning to move to Milwaukee so they’d accidentally move there instead. 

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GOOD NEWS 

Animal control officers were called to a North Carolina Dollar General store after a stray dog kept coming into the store and beelining for the toy aisle. A supervisor said “He went straight for the unicorn, the same one every time,” 

 

Workers told animal control officers that they caught the Lab mix darting into Dollar General every time a customer exited. Each time the stray dog made it in, he went to grab the same plush purple unicorn toy.

 

Samantha Lane, the officer who responded to the Dollar General store’s call, was so taken with the dog’s devotion to the unicorn that she bought the $10 toy for the dog. 

They named him Sisu after the dragon cartoon character in Disney’s new film, Raya and the Last Dragon

 

The shelter has received numerous calls from people interested in giving Sisu — and his beloved unicorn — a forever home and he and his stuffed animal will be moving out of the shelter soon.  

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BIRTHDAYS 

[78] Christopher Walken, actor (Oscar-“The Deer Hunter”, “Pulp Fiction”)

[73] Rhea Perlman, actress (“Cheers” 1982-1993)/movie actress (“Matilda”)

[50] Ewan McGregor, actor (“Moulin Rouge!”, “Trainspotting”) 

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LAW AND DISORDER……….

 

Mafia Fugitive Is Caught When He Posts a YouTube Cooking Video

There’s a 53-year-old guy named Marc Feren Claude Biart who’s been on the run from the authorities in Italy since 2014, after he was busted trafficking cocaine for the mafia.

It turns out he’s been hiding out in the Dominican Republic.  And he finally blew his cover . . . when he decided to host a YouTube channel showing off his Italian cooking skills.

And even though he never showed his face in the videos, he had unique and distinctive tattoos . . . so when someone in the Italian law enforcement world spotted them, they realized the cooking show host was Marc. He was arrested on Monday and taken back to Italy. 

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TIK TOK VIDEO LEADS TO A GUY GETTING FIRED

A guy in Florida, who was selling fake Covid vaccination cards, was fired from his job at a marketing company after someone on TikTok exposed him.  

(The guy’s name is James, and the woman who called him out is Mississippi pharmacist Savannah )

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Study Found Stretching Lowers Blood Pressure More Than Walking

Healthy habits and exercise that require little-to-no movement are always intriguing to us.  So this caught our attention . . .

 

A recent study found that if you want to lower your blood pressure, going on walks is a good way to do it . . . but staying home and STRETCHING might be even better.

 

A team at the University of Saskatchewan tracked 40 men with high blood pressure.  Half of them had to go for a brisk, 30-minute walk five times a week.  And the other half stayed home and stretched for 30 minutes.

 

And after two months, the ones who stretched five times a week lowered their blood pressure more than the ones who walked.

 

They think it’s because when you stretch your muscles, you’re also stretching out all the blood vessels that lead into those muscles, including your arteries.

 

This part’s important though:  The people in the study who walked five times a week lost more belly fat.  And stretching won’t lower cholesterol like walking or running does.

So you should really do both.  Try to walk, run, or get moving more often.  And also stretch before and after. 

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FAIL MAIL:
The author of a new book published to commemorate the 50th anniversary of the first email message, calls it a curse. 

 

Cal Newport’s book is called “A World Without Email: Reimagining Work in an Age of Communications Overload”. 

 

After studying the social effects of email for several years, the Georgetown University computer-science professor says “It just clashes with our fundamental human wiring to have this non-stop piling up of communication…that we can’t keep up with.” 

 

According to him, no matter how much we tell ourselves “it’s OK, we don’t have to answer these emails right away”, there’s a deeper part of our brain that is compelled to do so. 

 

And that makes us miserable, because we are overwhelmed with the urge to answer all our emails as they come in. Which, of course, leads to us doing our work outside of normal hours — which leads to burnout. 

 

What can be done about it? Newport suggests telling your colleagues you are available to respond to emails between the hours of 2-3 p.m. on Tuesdays and Thursdays, and not to expect to hear back from you outside those hours.

 

WEDNESDAY MARCH 31ST  

 

  1.   MTL 4 – EDM 0 BOS 5 – NJD 4 SO NYR 5 – WSH 2 CBJ 3 – TBL 1 

CHI 2 – CAR 1 FLA 4 – DET 1 NSH 3 – DAL 2 OT

 

It’s finally happening. The NFL is adding a 17th regular season game, beginning this coming season.  For the most part, the players won’t get any extra salary . . . yet . . . but they DO get a guaranteed share of the NFL’s revenue, and the league will make plenty of money off this.  (Here’s the “Sunday Night Football” theme music, to use as a talk bed.)

 

  1. Police in Jacksonville, Florida are looking for a porch pirate who stole packages while dressed up as an alien.  The homeowner talked to the local news about it.

 

  1.   If you try to impress your grandparents with how many views your video is getting, it may fall flat.  That’s what happened to comedian Atsuko Okatsuka.  Her grandma’s response to a clip approaching 800,000 views is, quote, “But no money.”

(It was posted March 21st on the Twitter page of @AtsukoComedy.)

 

  1.   Here’s comedian Brian Regan comparing doctors to veterinarians. (From his 2021 Netflix special, “On the Rocks”.)

 

LADY A STORIES

  • Lady A — Hillary Scott has sold her Southern manor home in an affluent Nashville suburb after more than a year on the market. She and her husband, drummer Chris Tyrrell, first listed the 6-bedroom, 7,851-square-foot mansion for $3.2 million in January 2020. The sale closed March 10 for $2.4 million.

 

  • Lady A’s Dave Haywood misses being on the road, but loves the time he’s been spending with his family.  Listen to him talk about it, here.

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MIRANDA LAMBERT’S ‘THE MARFA TAPES’ IS THE RESULT OF SIX YEARS OF FRIENDSHIP

Miranda Lambert‘s next project, The Marfa Tapes, is a collaboration with her good friends and frequent co-writers Jack Ingram and Jon Randall. The collection of work tapes features songs the trio have worked on together over the last several years.

Miranda tells us: [“Jack Ingram and Jon Randall are both long time Texas boy friends of mine. I grew up watching Jack play the Honkey Tonks in Texas and following him around since I was 15 and I’ve known John for 20 years. We were on Sony together when we were both on radio tour so just have a long history of friendship and they are two of my favorite artists and writers, and so we sort of started this little trio of songwriting together and have been doing it for six years.”] 

The Marfa Tapes was recorded in Marfa, TX. The project will be released on May 7th.

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CARLY PEARCE THANKS FANS FOR SUPPORT WHILE OFF THE ROAD 

Marking the one year anniversary of being off the road, Carly Pearce wrote to her fans on Instagram and said, “I can’t wait till we’re all back together again.” She says that even though she hasn’t seen them face to face, her fans have been there for her every step of the way. Carly tells us more: [“Fans say to me that I feel like their friend and that I’m writing their story. And that is all I really want to do as an artist. I don’t want people to feel like I’m not tangible. And I think just anyone telling me that I have a good heart, that means a lot to me, cause at the end of the day it’s what it’s all about.”] 

Carly has shows on her schedule beginning June 26 in Brainerd, MN.

Carly’s single with Lee Brice, “I Hope You’re Happy Now,” sold Platinum.

 

 

Luke Bryan Hooked Himself While Fishing

Next time LUKE BRYAN sings one of his fishing songs in concert you might see him POINT to one of the scars from this little mishap.  He posted a video yesterday of two fishing lure prongs that are stuck IN his hand.

One punctured the skin of his thumb . . . and the other went THROUGH the fleshy part between his index finger and thumb.  You see it sticking out the other side.  He’s still on the boat and hasn’t figured out how to remove the hooks.

Here’s what he says about it in the clip, quote, “Well, this is gonna leave a mark.  Pretty sure that’s in my bone.”

It’s not clear where he was fishing, but it’s probably NOT the ocean.  The water’s green and calm, and he’s wearing flip-flops.  You can hear people in the background so it may be a family fishing trip.

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