July 17

Published On July 17, 2015 | By Dave Palmer | On The Show Today

TODAY IS…………………..

  • “Mosquito Festival” in Berezniki, Russia. The 3rd annual 3-day bash in the Ural mountains includes music, dancing, and a man dressed as a giant mosquito. In the ‘Most Delicious Girl’ competition, women compete to see how many mosquito bites they can attract in 20 minutes.
  • Tomorrow is………..“Hot Dog Day”, celebrating the tube sandwich that no cookout or baseball game would be complete without.

 

ON THIS DATE…………..

1955 [60] ‘Disneyland’ officially opens in Anaheim CA, less than a year after construction began (now hosts over 14 million visitors a year, who spend close to $3 billion)

 

1983, CHiPS last aired on NBC

 

2007, Atlanta Falcons quarterback Michael Vick was indicted on illegal dogfighting charges. Officials, who raided his home, said he was breeding pit bulls. They found 54 dogs, a “rape stand,” used to hold dogs in place for mating; an electric treadmill modified for dogs and a bloody piece of carpeting.

 

2013 [02] In an effort to curb obesity rates, United Arab Emirates offers citizens 1 gram of gold for every kilogram of weight they lose

TODAY’S BIRTHDAYS………………….

Country singer Luke Bryan (39)

 

Country singer Craig Morgan (51)

 

TV Producer – (Survivor) – Mark Burnett (55)

 

Actor – David Hasselhoff (63)

 

Actor – Donald Sutherland (80) – (Hunger Games)

 

 

 

Lost Dog Walked 35 Miles Home . . . and Another Dog Made it Home After Four Years

Two ‘lost dog’ stories are in the news.  Maybe they’ll make your Friday better . . .

 

Back on June 27th, a 60-year-old woman named Kris Anderson was hiking in a county park near San Diego with her dog Georgia.  Georgia’s an eight-year-old Shar Pei mix, and at one point she took off after a rabbit.

 

Kris searched for hours, and drove 35 miles back to the park every day with her daughter.  But they never found Georgia, and park officials told her to give up because of all the coyotes in the area.  But Georgia DID survive.

 

Somehow she did the 35 miles home on her OWN.  She showed up at Kris’ house on Monday morning . . . pushed through a side gate . . . went inside through her dog door . . . walked upstairs . . . and jumped on Kris’ bed.  And all she had were some scratches.

 

And in Denver, a guy named Rodeon lost a Yorkshire Terrier named J back in April of 2011.  Someone left the front door open, J got out, and disappeared . . . for FOUR YEARS.  So obviously Rodeon gave up looking.

 

But someone found J running loose through Denver recently, and took him to a shelter to scan his microchip.

 

When Rodeon got the call to pick him up, J still remembered how to sit, lie down, and roll over.

 

WHAT’S HAPPENING

  • “Hell on Wheels” (AMC) – Saturday the Western drama gets ready to ride into the sunset with its 5th and final season debut.
  • “Tut” (Spike) – Sunday Ben Kingsley & Avan Jogia star in this 3-night, 6-hour dramatization of the reign of legendary Egyptian pharaoh Tutankhamun.

TODAY’S MOVIE OPENINGS:
• “Ant-Man” ( PG-13 Action Sci-Fi ) – Armed with a super-suit and the astonishing ability to shrink in scale but increase in strength, con-man ‘Scott Lang’ (Paul Rudd, in his first superhero role) must embrace his inner hero and help his mentor plan and pull off a heist that will save the world. Co-stars Michael Douglas, Evangeline Lilly.

• “Trainwreck” ( R-Rated Comedy ): Comedian Amy Schumer’s semi-autobiographical movie centers around a commitment-phobic career woman who has to finally face her fears when she meets a good guy. Director Judd Apatow. Co-stars Bill Hader, Brie Larson, Colin Quinn. Cameos from Daniel Radcliffe, LeBron James, Marisa Tomei, Matthew Broderick, Method Man.
Amber Heard Has Been Charged for Bringing Johnny Depp’s Dogs to Australia

Did you think anyone would actually face CRIMINAL CHARGES when JOHNNY DEPP and AMBER HEARD brought their dogs to Australia illegally?  Well, guess what?

 

Amber just got hit up on two counts of illegally importing the Yorkshire terriers, Pistol and Boo.  She also faces one count of producing some kind of false document.  She could be looking at up to 10 years in prison and a $75,000 fine.

 

The reason Australian officials threw a fit is because there are quarantine laws when it comes to bringing animals into a new country, to help stop the spread of disease.  And it’s a valid concern.  Still, this feels a little excessive.

 

They reportedly brought the dogs over on Johnny’s private jet while he was filming the new “Pirates of the Caribbean” movie.  Johnny sent them back after Australian officials gave him 72 hours to get them out of the country.

 

Amber has been ordered to appear before an Australian judge on September 7th.

In an interview last month, Amber slammed the guy who started all of this, Agriculture Minister Barnaby Jones.

 

 

Woman Cut a Fish’s Head Off, and Its Body Kept Moving

A video from last year of a fish that refused to DIE is getting a bunch of hits on YouTube.

 

A woman gutted it and cut its head off to make it for dinner, but the body kept flopping around on the cutting board.

 

Obviously it must have been some sort of death spasm, so it wasn’t technically “alive”.  But it’s still pretty creepy.

 

A Woman Got Busted for Counterfeiting, and Told Cops Obama Had Made it Legal to Print Your Own Money

A 45-year-old woman named Pamela Downs was busted on Sunday for using counterfeit money in Kingsport, Tennessee.

 

She tried to pay for something at a store using a $5 bill printed on two pieces of computer paper that were glued together and falling apart.

 

The cashier called the cops, and they found another counterfeit bill in Pamela’s purse.  That one was a hundred dollar bill . . . but the back of it was printed upside down, and the whole thing was in black-and-white.

 

They also found a receipt from Walmart for a printer, and she admitted she bought it to make counterfeit bills . . . but only because she thought it was LEGAL now.

 

Apparently Pamela is that friend who falls for every fake news story on Facebook.  She said she read a story online that President Obama was letting people on a fixed income print their own money.

 

A website called “The Skunk” posted an article in 2009 with the title, “Obama Wants Citizens to Print Their Own Money”.  Their tagline is “Tasteless American Satire for the Ill-Informed.”  But apparently Pamela missed that part.

 

Cops found between $30,000 and $50,000 in fake bills at her apartment, along with scissors and glue.  She’s charged with criminal simulation and counterfeiting.

 

 

A Bear Breaks Into a Bakery and Eats All Their Pies . . . Except For One Flavor

A bear broke into a bakery in Pinewood Springs, Colorado on Monday night.  He smashed a window, crawled in, and went straight for their pies . . . which he just DEVOURED.

 

Except for one flavor.  The bear ate 24 cherry pies, 14 apple pies, a few bags of cocoa and sugar . . . but wouldn’t touch the STRAWBERRY RHUBARB pies.

 

Because the bear knows what so many of us know:  Strawberry rhubarb pie is terrible.

 

The woman who owns the place says, quote, “Maybe he wasn’t feeling a tart pie, I guess.”

 

HEFTY HEADPHONES:
The new ‘Quincy Jones AKG N90Q’ headphones from Harman sound great, but are they worth $1,500?

 

Harman claims they are the world’s first with ‘personalized’ sound that adapts to the anatomy of the listener’s ear. That technology, ‘TruNote’, uses 2 microphones in each ear cup to measure frequency response and then uses filters to compensate accordingly while you wear them.

 

They also feature active noise cancellation to block out any unwanted background. The headphones, which ship in September, were designed and ‘inspired’ by Quincy Jones, the legendary multi-Grammy-winning producer who’s worked with the who’s who of the music world. Jones predicts the technology will eventually be adapted to more affordable headphones. – Reviewed.com

GREATEST INVENTION EVER?

The ‘Hydro Hammock’ is where we want to be right now! The hybrid gizmo offers up the ‘bliss of a hot tub’ along with the ‘freedom of a hammock’. Genius inventor Benjamin Frederick from Ashland, Oregon has created a gas heating system that can heat water from a garden hose, draw from a lake or stream, or just heat water already in the hammock, allowing you to enjoy a warm soak while swingin’ from the trees … or whatever.

 

The hammock has capacity for 2 people and 50 gallons (190 liters) of water. You can choose between a single-layer hammock which is more portable, or a double-layer version which is fully insulated and can even be used outdoors in Winter.

The product, now fundraising on Kickstarter, will set you back $1,180.
There’s a New Service That Will Dump Someone For You

The modern non-confrontational way to DUMP someone is with a text message.  But if you’re too much of a coward to even do THAT . . . this could be your answer.

 

A 37-year-old woman named Kristy Mazins in Melbourne, Australia just started a new business called Sorry It’s Over, where she’ll dump someone FOR you.

You tell her why you want to end things, and she’ll contact the person to gently but firmly deliver the news.  She charges around $4.50 to text or email them . . . $10 to call them . . . or $55 to sit down with them face-to-face.

 

Kristy says she started the business when she realized the people today in their 20s are tech savvy . . . but terrible at confrontation.

 

She also says she’s got a knack for breaking up with people so they aren’t devastated.  Quote, “I’m quite good at mediating people’s relationships.  It’s a gift.”  You can see more at her website Sorry it’s over dot com dot au.

 

RANDOM REPORT

  1. The “chung chung” sound from“Law & Order” is a combination of nearly a dozen sounds, including a gavel, a jail door slamming, and 500 monks walking across a hardwood floor.

 

  1. 94% of fatal dog attacks involve male dogs who aren’t neutered.

 

  1. The guy who invented Vaseline ate a spoonful of it every day . . . and he lived to be 92.

 

  1. The“Mighty Morphin Power Rangers” TV show was banned by the Malaysian government in 1995 because they were afraid “morphin” was too close to “morphine,” and kids would think drugs were the key to becoming a superhero.

 

 

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